Calling all worriers - take the anxiety test

Worrying is like a rocking chair, it gives you something to do but it doesn't get you anywhere. We all worry at times, but if your worrying is running you, it's time to get out of that chair. Like Mr Worry are you addicted to worrying?

In the olden days, when the threat of being eaten by something, or charcoaled by dragon fire (according to Ruben, age 6) us humans were on constant alert for threats. The daily quest for water, food, hatching babies and staying alive was a full-time job. There were no 28 days holiday, duvet days, or sabbaticals to search for the meaning of life back then. Our ancestors legacy is a deeply installed, and hormonally supported blueprint to self-protect and stay alive.

Forward wind to 2013 and that legacy is active in all of our everyday lives. When faced with any perceived threat our mind and body reacts. The film, TV, advertising, book and gaming industries tap into engage our brains to emotionally react to what is being viewed. Our imaginations are a key portal into the mind and body connection. Imagination doesn't know the difference between an imagined experience and a real one. It tells the body to react for a moment as if the imagined threat was real. Think of a picture or time when you couldn't stop laughing...bet you have just started to giggle. That's the power of the imagination on the mind and body.

Today the dragons have been substituted by more of an invisible and internal threat, ' a fear of the future' produces anxiety. Anxiety is a mind and body response to an imagined fear in the future. The fear could be that perhaps in the future someone won't like you, or that you will get something very wrong, fail, or that you wont have enough money to live. Either way the message to the mind is that there is something significantly painful coming at you like a high speed train from the future. You can't avoid the future.

We all get nervous when stepping out of our comfort zone doing something new, or when something is demanded from us that we believe we lack the skill or experience for. If your thoughts, anxieties, or fears are impacting your quality of life, or you are constantly trying to avoid your fears by over-controlling your life -

Take the Anxiety test

Choose the one description for each item that best describes how many days you have been bothered by each of the following over the past 2 weeks

 

	None	Several	7 or more	Nearly Every day
Feeling Nervous, anxious or on edge
Unable to stop worrying
Worrying too much about different things
Problems relaxing
Feeling restless or unable to sit still
Feeling irritable or easily annoyed
Being afraid that something awful might happen

 Scoring

Total scores for each question

• None = 2
• Several = 1
• 7 or more = 2
• Nearly every day = 3

Total score _______________________

• A total score of 5-9 suggests mild anxiety
• A total score of 10 + suggests moderate to severe anxiety

If anxiety is holding you back in your life, stop coping with it, there is so much that can be done to overcome it and get your freedom back. Talk to someone, you will be amazed at how many people suffer with anxiety. Speak to your GP about CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy) or talk to me about the amazing Thought Pattern Management system. Time to turn your Mr Worry into Mr Happy.

Therapy Tuesday

'Worrying is like a rocking chair, it gives you something to do but it doesn't get you anywhere' ancient proverb

How true is this!! If we added up all the minutes we spent worrying about something in the last month, most of us would have found some very valuable time to invest doing something much more fun. Worrying does nothing, that's right, NOTHING to help us. It does not provide solutions, it doesn't comfort, it does not make us healthy, and it does not improve our relationships.

So what is the purpose of worrying?

When you are in a state of 'worry' you are worrying about something that hasn't yet happened. True? It's worrying about the future. That is, your brain is creating lots of negative possibilities for the future. It's a bit like having a train stopped between stations and the driver putting the handbrake on (or whatever a train has!) and sitting and worrying about what's at the next station. What the driver needs to do is decide where the train is going, if the track ahead is going where he doesn't want to go, he needs to create and build a new track. Then he needs to get back on the train and take the handbrake off.

Many people have become expert worriers and are still in nappies when it comes to truly creating their own solutions. I know I was!

A client I worked with last year was constantly 'worrying' about money. His very real lack of funds was crippling his quality of life. The worry was preventing him from being able to view his options and was creating much stress. What he was doing was trying to survive on so little. What he wasn't doing was investing the same energy in creating HOW he could raise his income. In other words he was keeping the problem. In his case his money strategies began when he was six years old...but that's a blog for another day.

Whatever you are dealing with in life you CAN live a worry free life - worry simply indicates that you have run out of track. The solution is to check back in and create YOUR OWN choices for the future.

Stop worrying, choose your thoughts carefully, and get monstrously creative. The answers are all in your own noggin.

Happy Tuesday

Holidays - heaven or hell?

It's that time of year again when everyone is thinking about taking a break and going on holiday. For many of us this year there just isn't the budget to actually go away from home. If you feel like you need a holiday, what can you do instead?
The most important thing about taking a holiday is having a rest, mentally & physically. However, as we have witnessed in many a 'holiday from hell’ programme this isn't always the case! There are many things you can adopt to ensure that a holiday at home provides a good break with a sprinkle of fun. There are many things you can do to unplug and deflate from the usual escalator of life.

How to get all the benefits of a holiday without leaving home:

1) Call it a holiday – just because you are at home it is still a holiday. Calling it ‘off work’ doesn’t sound anywhere near as fun.
2) Tell your colleagues and boss that you are going away on holiday – you will be amazed how resourceful people can be when they believe you are away. Essentially how you communicate your boundaries shows others how to treat you.
3) Do a written and verbal handover of any current projects, even if that is not a usual requirement.
4) Decide what holiday spends you have as if you were changing money at the airport – This gives you guilt-free permission to eat out, treat your self to a massage, have a spray tan, buy a spur of the moment gypsy dress you will never wear after your holiday, keep the kids busy with activities etc.
5) What is it you want to gain? – Pre holiday, invest 15mins deciding specifically what it is you most want to gain from a break. Is it fun or relaxation? Fitness or lazy days? Decisions detox? Reduce your stress level. How do you want your life to look, feel and be as a result of taking a holiday?
6) Who wants to come too? – Invite a friend to join you on your week off, just as you would if you were going away. Same rules apply, make sure you both want the same from your holiday
7) Pot Luck anyone? – Invite your friends round for an evening. Set the theme as a country and everyone has to bring a random dish.
8) Delegate – book an au pair for the week, or send them off to grannies. Have a holiday from your holiday, create essential YOU time. If you are not full up how can you keep giving to others. 9) It’s not my job – before your holiday write down all your responsibilities, put them into a suitcase or better still post them to you at work so that they are there to pick up when you return. Work from home? Post them to a fantasy address.
10) Be open to adventure – Get out of your comfort zone, develop a holiday alter ego and give it all a go…